I should have been at the U2 concert last night. I'm not a huge fan, but I saw some of my coworker's pictures and videos, and it looked like a great show! I had a few opportunities to go, but they didn't pan out. That's okay, next time!
I had my appointment with my therapist last night after not seeing her for over a month. She told me about her assignment with the military and it sounds really cool. She's getting back into the swing of things. Based on things that are going on with me, and me loving life, she recommended that I just come monthly for a tune-up. I've been doing so well, and feeling incredible. Sounds like a great plan to me!
I've been reading more chapters from the book written by the Dahlia Lama, and I'm about to start the section on self-discovery. So far I've learned that things are never what they seem, as they are not made whole. Everything has parts, and parts have parts, which mean imperfections are everywhere. Anytime something seems perfect, remember that it is not. He also talks a lot about lust and anger, and how they stand in the way of finding stillness.
After my alarm went off this morning, I was laying in bed for a few minutes thinking about the pieces of me. What is in my shadow that I have yet to discover, and what is known to the world? I seem to have a few different parts, or roles, that are activated by the various people in my life. Some that I have given name to are: "The Innocent," "The Brain," "Miss Manners," "Holder of the World," and the "Sexy Woman." They each show up, but I haven't integrated them fully. Some naturally flow together, but not all. Now the chore is to determine what triggers the release of these roles by certain people, and how I can hold all of them at once.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Damn! I look good!
Everything seems to be coming together for me as I keep spiraling up from change that I started a few months ago. I just feel so good, both emotionally and physically, and the glow can be seen from my eyes.
And, damn I look good today. I'm wearing a sea foam green new top, which is an empire waist and long bottom. There's light ruffles on the bodice and wrists, with a mandarin collar and buttons up the front of the bodice. I'm wearing it with chocolate brown slacks and my brown heels. My hair is so soft looking and shiny, and with my coloring the sea foam compliments it so well. I sparkle, without having glitter! hehe I think it helps that I got a lot of sleep last night. I fell asleep on the couch after dinner around 8pm, missing Dancing with the Stars, and my mom woke me up at 10 to tell me to go to bed. I moved into my comfy bed, promptly falling back asleep until 7am this morning. Sigh! I also smell really good today. I have a new fragrance in my mix, and since I don't wear it all the time I can smell it. Its a shame that my office doesn't have a lot of men to flirt with, although I may go out at lunch time and people watch. Its a glorious day!
I've been practicing the insight meditation and metta which I think has been helping me a lot. Goodness begets goodness. Which is the principle in The Secret or The Law of Attraction. The universe can only send you what you put out, so feeling good brings more good feeling things. Class this weekend was wonderful, I love my friends, I'm flirting with new guys, and I just feel good.
A few weeks ago I mentioned running into a VJC grad at the gym. He was there last night as well, so we spent a few minutes chatting. Really nice guy. I didn't recognize him at first, but he approached me, which was sweet.
I had a lot of interesting dreams last night that I actually remember. One involving Sam of all things, although indirectly. All of his classmates were out at a festival, he did not come because he was afraid of running into me, or so they told me. I chatted with them for a bit, and they told me that he's having trouble finding the words to say to me. I told them to let him know that if he just opens his mouth, things that are supposed to come out, will. Then I left them and went to the bank. Somehow I had in my possession over 5 million dollars in artifacts and money that needed to be placed in a deposit box. I had to travel down to the vault with the bank attendant, to make sure the money/stuff got to where it was going. We first had to spread it out all on a table, and it wasn't really money. It was golden puzzle pieces that were very tiny. We had to put them together to form some sort of pattern and structure that would give us a picture/key to figuring out the rest. Once put together they made ancient art that depicted religious things. We didn't finish, but somewhere along the way I picked up an ice cream cone. It was good. For some reason, because I had them in my possession meant that I was chosen and powerful - but no one really knew why. I just knew that I had to put them together to figure it out. And it was very important that we had security protection, because we didn't want anyone else down in the vault to know what we were doing, or that this stuff was there. There were so many little pieces to put together, we had to make sure that we didn't lose any. Interesting!
Anyway.... off to start my day!
And, damn I look good today. I'm wearing a sea foam green new top, which is an empire waist and long bottom. There's light ruffles on the bodice and wrists, with a mandarin collar and buttons up the front of the bodice. I'm wearing it with chocolate brown slacks and my brown heels. My hair is so soft looking and shiny, and with my coloring the sea foam compliments it so well. I sparkle, without having glitter! hehe I think it helps that I got a lot of sleep last night. I fell asleep on the couch after dinner around 8pm, missing Dancing with the Stars, and my mom woke me up at 10 to tell me to go to bed. I moved into my comfy bed, promptly falling back asleep until 7am this morning. Sigh! I also smell really good today. I have a new fragrance in my mix, and since I don't wear it all the time I can smell it. Its a shame that my office doesn't have a lot of men to flirt with, although I may go out at lunch time and people watch. Its a glorious day!
I've been practicing the insight meditation and metta which I think has been helping me a lot. Goodness begets goodness. Which is the principle in The Secret or The Law of Attraction. The universe can only send you what you put out, so feeling good brings more good feeling things. Class this weekend was wonderful, I love my friends, I'm flirting with new guys, and I just feel good.
A few weeks ago I mentioned running into a VJC grad at the gym. He was there last night as well, so we spent a few minutes chatting. Really nice guy. I didn't recognize him at first, but he approached me, which was sweet.
I had a lot of interesting dreams last night that I actually remember. One involving Sam of all things, although indirectly. All of his classmates were out at a festival, he did not come because he was afraid of running into me, or so they told me. I chatted with them for a bit, and they told me that he's having trouble finding the words to say to me. I told them to let him know that if he just opens his mouth, things that are supposed to come out, will. Then I left them and went to the bank. Somehow I had in my possession over 5 million dollars in artifacts and money that needed to be placed in a deposit box. I had to travel down to the vault with the bank attendant, to make sure the money/stuff got to where it was going. We first had to spread it out all on a table, and it wasn't really money. It was golden puzzle pieces that were very tiny. We had to put them together to form some sort of pattern and structure that would give us a picture/key to figuring out the rest. Once put together they made ancient art that depicted religious things. We didn't finish, but somewhere along the way I picked up an ice cream cone. It was good. For some reason, because I had them in my possession meant that I was chosen and powerful - but no one really knew why. I just knew that I had to put them together to figure it out. And it was very important that we had security protection, because we didn't want anyone else down in the vault to know what we were doing, or that this stuff was there. There were so many little pieces to put together, we had to make sure that we didn't lose any. Interesting!
Anyway.... off to start my day!
Monday, September 28, 2009
Great weekend!
I have so much to say, and it all doesn't flow, so I'll just chunk it again!
1. We are going to Bermuda! The director of our program announced that the faculty finally made the decision to send my cohort to Bermuda for our International Residency! I am so excited! I was just there in August of 2008 for vacation, and now I get to spend 10/11 days there in Feb of next year with my cohort. It is a working trip, but we are going to have so much fun! I can't wait!
2. I learned some new techniques for relaxing my shoulders and neck. Stephanie has been doing body work for awhile, and she pushed on my shoulders from above, and I could literally feel the energy drain out of my head and into my gut. Its supposed to help insomniacs who can't sleep because of their spiraling thoughts. Which, is not me, but it felt really really good. My shoulders have been tight for the last few days, and she was able to get some of the knots out. She also did an intense shoulder massage which was heavenly! Adam, the younger brother of the cohort, is really sweet. As I was getting my massage, he sat on the floor in front of me to get his shoulders rubbed. Stephanie made me so relaxed, I just cuddled up to his back and closed my eyes for a few minutes. He makes a great pillow. And I don't think he gets enough attention. He's really young, and is the only guy in a class of 18 women.
3. The Marriott Wardman is freaking huge! I can only describe it as a Vegas-style hotel, when it comes to size. The beds were comfy, and the room was rather large. April stayed over with me Saturday night, which is a lot of fun. We walked through a convention's breakfast on the way to the parking garage and we decided that we just need to hit all the conventions in DC - lots of yummy looking guys mingling about! Or hang out at the lobby bar after the convention events!
4. The usual group of cohort ladies went out to dinner on Saturday night. Nidhi took us to her favorite Indian restaurant in Arlington. It was SOOOOO GOOD! I had a lamb and rice dish, but everything was amazing. We just passed the plates around and shared everything. Even Christine, our meat and potatoes lady, enjoyed the food. Then we headed over to a tap house for a drink or two. I found a new orange wheat beer that was delicious. This is when the conversation really got interesting. One of the ladies wanted us to rate our own selves in bed! hehehehehe A few of us single ladies concluded that we need lovers. hehehe
5. I did not meet up with my friend like I thought I would. We did exchange texts early on Friday, but he told me he might fly out to see his fiance in Denver for the weekend. It was a spur of the moment thing. He was supposed to text me by Friday afternoon to let me know, but he never did. Oh well, I don't need friends like that. I don't care that he wanted to go see her, hell, I'd go see my love too - but a courtesy text one way or another would have been nice.
6. I got a lot of compliments on my weight loss in the last few days. I'm so proud of myself! I feel really good, and I'm going to continue on this path!
7. I've been so happy the last week or so. I think my moods really do depend on my PMS. But I'm having fun, I love where I am, and I'm just feeling really hopeful about the future. I'm having fun, and its no longer an effort, I'm starting to have fun in everything I do again! I'm back!
8. I started talking to a few different guys over the last week too from the dating website. No, not the one I reported about last week, other ones. Hopefully a date or two will pan out with them, but nothing scheduled yet. Dating is fun!
I think that covers everything lurking around in my head.... hehehe
Have a great Monday!
1. We are going to Bermuda! The director of our program announced that the faculty finally made the decision to send my cohort to Bermuda for our International Residency! I am so excited! I was just there in August of 2008 for vacation, and now I get to spend 10/11 days there in Feb of next year with my cohort. It is a working trip, but we are going to have so much fun! I can't wait!
2. I learned some new techniques for relaxing my shoulders and neck. Stephanie has been doing body work for awhile, and she pushed on my shoulders from above, and I could literally feel the energy drain out of my head and into my gut. Its supposed to help insomniacs who can't sleep because of their spiraling thoughts. Which, is not me, but it felt really really good. My shoulders have been tight for the last few days, and she was able to get some of the knots out. She also did an intense shoulder massage which was heavenly! Adam, the younger brother of the cohort, is really sweet. As I was getting my massage, he sat on the floor in front of me to get his shoulders rubbed. Stephanie made me so relaxed, I just cuddled up to his back and closed my eyes for a few minutes. He makes a great pillow. And I don't think he gets enough attention. He's really young, and is the only guy in a class of 18 women.
3. The Marriott Wardman is freaking huge! I can only describe it as a Vegas-style hotel, when it comes to size. The beds were comfy, and the room was rather large. April stayed over with me Saturday night, which is a lot of fun. We walked through a convention's breakfast on the way to the parking garage and we decided that we just need to hit all the conventions in DC - lots of yummy looking guys mingling about! Or hang out at the lobby bar after the convention events!
4. The usual group of cohort ladies went out to dinner on Saturday night. Nidhi took us to her favorite Indian restaurant in Arlington. It was SOOOOO GOOD! I had a lamb and rice dish, but everything was amazing. We just passed the plates around and shared everything. Even Christine, our meat and potatoes lady, enjoyed the food. Then we headed over to a tap house for a drink or two. I found a new orange wheat beer that was delicious. This is when the conversation really got interesting. One of the ladies wanted us to rate our own selves in bed! hehehehehe A few of us single ladies concluded that we need lovers. hehehe
5. I did not meet up with my friend like I thought I would. We did exchange texts early on Friday, but he told me he might fly out to see his fiance in Denver for the weekend. It was a spur of the moment thing. He was supposed to text me by Friday afternoon to let me know, but he never did. Oh well, I don't need friends like that. I don't care that he wanted to go see her, hell, I'd go see my love too - but a courtesy text one way or another would have been nice.
6. I got a lot of compliments on my weight loss in the last few days. I'm so proud of myself! I feel really good, and I'm going to continue on this path!
7. I've been so happy the last week or so. I think my moods really do depend on my PMS. But I'm having fun, I love where I am, and I'm just feeling really hopeful about the future. I'm having fun, and its no longer an effort, I'm starting to have fun in everything I do again! I'm back!
8. I started talking to a few different guys over the last week too from the dating website. No, not the one I reported about last week, other ones. Hopefully a date or two will pan out with them, but nothing scheduled yet. Dating is fun!
I think that covers everything lurking around in my head.... hehehe
Have a great Monday!
Thursday, September 24, 2009
skinny news!
I had to share, it was very exciting! I went to meet with one of my clients, most of which I haven't seen since I conducted a focus group with them back in June. They all came up to me after the meeting and wanted to know if I was shrinking! They could tell that I've lost a lot of weight! WOOO HOOOO!!!! I feel skinny! :) Not really yet, but I'm starting to feel it!
Thanksgiving Excitement!
After 30 years of watching it on TV, I finally get to go to the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade in NY! My mom and cousins RoseCarol and TJ are all going up Wednesday and staying through Friday. I get to see the balloons blown up in Central Park on Wednesday night, the Parade on Thursday, and then a great Thanksgiving dinner at a restaurant, and then Black Friday in NY! It is also my cousin's birthday on that Friday, so we have to do something special for him. I CAN'T WAIT!
I got a room at a swanky hotel on priceline yesterday, and my fingers are crossed that they will be able to upgrade us to a room with two doubles when we get there. If not, I don't care, I'll sleep on the floor! I'm going to the parade! I love a parade! I am so excited!!!!
I also can't wait for this weekend at school. I'm so excited to go! I get to sleep in the comfy Marriott bed all weekend, see my girls, and just escape for a bit! WOOT! I'm full of positive good energy, and have been for the last few days! Life is good!
I got a room at a swanky hotel on priceline yesterday, and my fingers are crossed that they will be able to upgrade us to a room with two doubles when we get there. If not, I don't care, I'll sleep on the floor! I'm going to the parade! I love a parade! I am so excited!!!!
I also can't wait for this weekend at school. I'm so excited to go! I get to sleep in the comfy Marriott bed all weekend, see my girls, and just escape for a bit! WOOT! I'm full of positive good energy, and have been for the last few days! Life is good!
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
September Book Club
I'm impressed with myself. I bought "My Sister's Keeper" weeks ago, but never got around to reading it. I picked it up around 5:15pm last night, took a break to get a pedicure, and then eat dinner, and finished the entire book by 11pm! I had to finish it, as book club is tonight. What a tear-jerker! I need to talk to the girls in the group, because we have to stop reading books that make me cry. I don't think I can see the movie, it would get me all worked up.
I don't know if I was in the situation of the parents what I would do. Basically they genetically engineered a baby to match the genetics of the older sister so she could be a match and save the older sister's life. The story is about the struggle of growing up in a family like that, where everything is focused on the older sister, and the younger sister never being heard or seen as her own person. I won't ruin the ending, but she truly was her sister's keeper.
I am really getting excited about going away to school this weekend. There are many reasons, mainly that this is a lighter class, where we don't have to do any interpersonal scoop up of our inner shadow. My personality, based on my MBTI, preference is to do interpersonal work and continually ask the question 'why', but sometimes I just want it to stop. I'm going to have fun with the girls out on the town! WOOT! I get to sleep in a awesome Marriott bed (I love their beds) and if the calendars work out, I get to see a friend who I haven't seen in 8 years! I'm really looking forward to that!
I don't know if I was in the situation of the parents what I would do. Basically they genetically engineered a baby to match the genetics of the older sister so she could be a match and save the older sister's life. The story is about the struggle of growing up in a family like that, where everything is focused on the older sister, and the younger sister never being heard or seen as her own person. I won't ruin the ending, but she truly was her sister's keeper.
I am really getting excited about going away to school this weekend. There are many reasons, mainly that this is a lighter class, where we don't have to do any interpersonal scoop up of our inner shadow. My personality, based on my MBTI, preference is to do interpersonal work and continually ask the question 'why', but sometimes I just want it to stop. I'm going to have fun with the girls out on the town! WOOT! I get to sleep in a awesome Marriott bed (I love their beds) and if the calendars work out, I get to see a friend who I haven't seen in 8 years! I'm really looking forward to that!
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Getting out of bed
I love fall-ish mornings, but it is so hard for me to get out of bed. Especially since I have the fleecy plush throw on top of the bedspread. I was just sitting here thinking about going to bed tonight and how excited I am to do that! Its the little things that make me happy.
In the morning it is so cool in my room, plus I have the ceiling fan on, so I normally have all the blankets piled on top of me. I slide one leg out of the side and put it on top of the fleecy throw and cuddle up to an extra pillow. Plus with my need for high thread count sheets, the pillowcase is so soft and silky. I could lay there for hours and just pet the throw.... its the little things in life that make me happy! hehehe
In the morning it is so cool in my room, plus I have the ceiling fan on, so I normally have all the blankets piled on top of me. I slide one leg out of the side and put it on top of the fleecy throw and cuddle up to an extra pillow. Plus with my need for high thread count sheets, the pillowcase is so soft and silky. I could lay there for hours and just pet the throw.... its the little things in life that make me happy! hehehe
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